Homophobia

I received my first "in person" dose of intolerance and homophobia today while shopping. I was at a store talking to the employee about something simple when I mentioned my "partner."

Me: "Yeah my partner has...."

Employee: "Oh really?"

Me: "Yeah she said...."

Employee: (Eyes widen then narrow at me) "Your partner is a woman?"

Me: (Confused) "Yes." 

Employee: "I'll gotta go." (She turns and walks away. Walks to another employee and whispers something to her and points at me.)

They share a look the the first employee walks out of sight to gods only knows where. I continued my shopping by myself still confused and not finding everything that I wanted.  Going up the cash register with my purchase the first employee is still no where in sight.  The second one slowly makes her way behind the register. Not saying a word to me she starts ringing up my items.  I'm still confused and irritated by this point.  This is a store that I have been to a few times and they have a point reward system for purchases.  I tell her that I don't have my card with me but that I do have one somewhere and ask if she can look it up. 

She sighs, rolls her eyes at me and says "I guess so."

 I asked "Can you look it up by my phone number?" 

Her reply "Whatever." 

This pisses me off. I have NO idea what the hell I did to make these people act like this toward me.  Anyone that knows me can tell you that I speak my mind no matter the situation so I ask "Is there a problem that I'm not aware of?"

Her response was a grunt. A Grunt. A fraking GRUNT!!

I ask, "Did I do something that I'm not aware of?" (I'm thinking I asked too many questions about what I was looking for or they were just irritated that they showed me several different of the items I was looking for before I found what I wanted.)

She sneered at me "We don't like your kind." 

I stare at her for about thirty seconds trying to figure out what 'my kind' is.  I'm standing at a makeup counter so it can't be that I'm a woman. I'm in a store that I usually see mostly women in. And she IS a women. I have no idea what the hell she is talking about so I ask, "My kind? What kind am I?" 

She glances around the store before whispering, "lesbians." 

NOW my brain to mouth filter (and apparently my volume control) is completely gone. "Lesbians? You don't like lesbians?" 

I now have the attention of anyone within hearing distance. "So your co-worker refused to help me find what I needed and walked away and you are being an ass because you think I'm a lesbian and you 'don't like my kind'?" 

She just glared at me. Not wanting to get arrested I decided it was time I leave before I slap the dumb bitch up side the head and go find her co-worker to do the same.  

I left my entire purchase which added up to be around $50 on the counter and walked away.  As I was leaving the store I noticed six other women put their purchased down in front of her and follow me out.  

One woman caught up to me outside the store and told me she was very sorry that I had to go through that and that I was a very brave person for sticking up for myself. The others passed by and smiled at me. 

I honestly wanted to cry. I know that there are people out there who are intolerant and homophobic but I never thought in a million years I would have to deal with two of them at the same time being that rude to me. 

The reason I thought I would never be on the receiving end of homophobia us because I am NOT a lesbian. I have been married to a man for almost eleven years. The "partner" I was speaking of was my work partner. I DO however completely support equality no matter your sexual orientation.  Love is love no matter who it is you love. I explained to the woman that followed me out that I was not gay and that I was married. She asked why I let the woman at the counter believe I was. I told her that it didn't matter if I denied it or not. If I denied it then I would just be playing into her childish homophobic ways. That she wouldn't care what I said, once she thought it nothing I was going to say was going to change her mind.  She informed me she would never shop at that store again. My goal wasn't to make people not shop there but I thanked her anyway and went on with my shopping.  To say the least I will NEVER set foot in that store again. Unless it's to go speak to the manager about their employees.  Which probably won't make a difference anyway. Actually I'm such a bitch maybe I'll go in there and look around the next time I'm there just to irritate the shit out of the little bitch. Can you get arrested for walking around a store and not buying anything if you mind your own business? 

I still don't understand how people can be and act the way they do. We're all people. We're all human beings. I know that I've lived a somewhat sheltered life growing up and living where I do but this is ridiculous.  I'm not saying any of this to make myself look good because I stood up for something. And I know I'm not the only one that has ever had to deal with people like this. I know many people have had a lot worse experiences than what I did today. I just wanted to say no one should have to be treated this way. If anyone is ever treated this way please know that not everyone thinks the way these two women do. There are a lot of people out there that support you. Stand up for yourself and keep you head held high. 

  

Destiny's Journey (Destinies Book 2) Damian's story

I have finally finished writing Damian's story in my Destinies series.  This book was very hard for me to write because I knew exactly where it was going.  ALL the characters were talking to me and the story was flowing perfectly.  The rate I was writing it should have been finished in about two months but as I was writing I remembered something that was in the submission rules for my publisher.

I went back and checked the rules again and of course what I remembered was the actual rule.  After rereading the rules I had to change almost the whole story.  While my characters did get their HEA it took a long time.  Once they realized I was going to "fuck with their life" they were pissed and refused to speak to me.

No matter how many times I begged and pleaded with them and promised them they would get their HEA they would just have to work for it they would not cooperate.  By not cooperate I mean they wouldn't speak to me when I was trying to write their story but when I would try to work on something else they were in the back of my mind jumping up and down, waving their arms so I couldn't concentrate on anything but them.

Finally after almost a year of trying to tell their story, I have finished and submitted it to Siren.  Now I'm waiting to see if they will accept it.  My hope is that they do and that my fans that enjoyed No Escape From Destiny like Destiny's Journey just as much if not more.  Damian and his mates were my favorite yet to write and as much of a pain in the ass they were I love them dearly and can't wait for their story to be heard.

While I'm sure the men in the above picture are not going to be on the finished cover they are the men I had in mind while I was writing this book.  I will keep everyone updated on Siren's response and when/if it will be published.

To anyone that read No Escape From Destiny and have been waiting for the next book.  Thank you so much for your patience.  I probably could have finished it sooner but neither myself or my characters would have been happy with it if I had to leave out certain elements that needed to be in the story.

I have ideas for at least two more books in the Destinies series and have already started working on book two of the Alpha Mates series along with a BDSM book possibly to be titled Kenzie's Saviors. Now that Destiny's Journey is complete I'm hoping Damian and his mates will be happy and let me write the other characters I have wandering around in my mind waiting for their chance to be heard.

So graceful.

Growing up I took dance lessons for 11 years, won competitions. Gymnastics for 6 years, won meets. Karate for 5 years, won tournaments and got my black belt. Was a cheerleader, won competitions. That being said, I'm a KLUTZ! Apparently my gracefulness only extends to difficult things, not normal everyday tasks.

Yesterday I had my kids throw their dirty clothes down the stairs so I could do laundry. On my way down said stair I tripped on the clothes half way down and fell the rest of the way. All day I was on the couch unable to move and in pain. Today I'm still so sore I had to call in sick. I trip over flat surfaces except when I'm wearing 4 inch heels.

What I can't figure out is how I can go from doing cartwheels on a balance beam and jump spin kicks in karate to tripping over flat surfaces.

Today I'll be laying on the couch again bruised from my ass to my shoulder. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

Acting practice

First of all let me tell you that I have always been and will probably always be petrified of thunder and lightning storms.  While I love the look of lightning in pictures there is just something about being in the middle of the storm that scares me.

That being said let me tell you how great an actress I must have been last night. 

I started reading Alicia White's His Mating Mark yesterday and couldn't go to sleep until I finished it. By the time I finished it was about 12:30 am.  I put my kindle away knowing I needed to be up at 5 to go to work. 

I know more than rolled over and got comfy when I heard thunder in the distance.  Over the next few minutes it got louder until the house started shaking from the loudness. I knew it was going to be right on top of us soon.  Checking the weather report quickly on my phone I see a weather alert.

SEVERE THUNDERSTORM WARNING!!

Cloud to ground lightning, an inch of rain in less than an hour, high winds, and damaging hail. 

GREAT!!!

Psyching myself up I say "I can do this. It's outside. Nothing can hurt me in the house. Everything will be fine."  Few minutes later the rain starts. And by rain I mean sheets of water pouring down. Within seconds the rain turns to hail. I can hear the balls of ice hitting the roof.  

Knowing the my daughter is also scared of the storms I decided I had to check on her as her and her slightly older brother (who can sleep through anything) were camping out in the living room.  As I get ready to leave the bedroom to go check on her my husbands fire pager goes off reporting a house fire.  My first thought of course was that that house got struck by the lightning so me being "Anal, anything bad that can happen WILL happen Mom" woke my teenager up and made him go downstairs with me so that we would all be in the same room if anything happened.  He of course being a teenager though I was crazy and didn't want to get up.  After telling him to get up or I was going to carry him down the stairs he got up and followed me.

We get to the bottom of the stairs.  I have a very protective boxer who thinks he is vicious   My horribly scary dog was curled up in the smallest ball he could in his crate with his head hidden under his blanket whining. 

My daughter is also awake sitting up on the couch staring out the window.  I sit with her and tell her it's just a  storm while the entire time I'm also looking out the window wondering how bad it's going to get.  Every time the sky would light up and the thunder would boom she would jump.  I must say that I am very proud of myself. I wanted to hide in my bed with the covers over my head and earphone with loud music but because I hope my daughter will eventually grow out of her fear I stayed up with her until the storm passed.  I must have been a pretty convincing actress because before long she was sound asleep again. 

Finally at 2am I went to bed but laid awake unable to get my brain to shut off.  Three hours later my alarm went off and I wanted to throw my phone across the room. Instead I got up and headed to work. Yay me!! 

Due to a family emergency I ended up staying at work for only two hours but I'm still exhausted. 

The strangest part about the whole night was the fact that I know if my daughter wasn't scared of the storm or the kids hadn't been home I would have been hiding in fear.  It's amazing what you can do for you child. Even if it's as simple as not letting them see your fear so they can overcome theirs.  

Traveling with Plastic Surgery Barbie

As some of you know if you follow me on facebook I recently traveled from New York to Florida.  This is my fourth trip this year in an attempt to get a job and move south and each time I travel I find new and exciting, if not crazy people in airports and on the planes.  This trip was no exception.  

Getting ready to board the first flight the man at the counter announces that since there are so few passengers please sit in the last four rows of the plane regardless of what your ticket says your seat assignment says.  One woman asked why. The response was "to balance the weight." I thought she was going to faint right there.  All the color drained from her face. I'm not sure if she thought the plane would crash or if she just felt she needed to sit in her assigned seat.  She asked several time and told him she was supposed to be in seat 3B. I think he had to explain to her about six times where to sit. 

The rest of the boarding and flight was fine except it may have been the bumpiest flight I have ever been on. Then the airport was so big that I had to just about run to the gate for my next flight.  I didn't have time to go to the bathroom but I did make two minutes time to stop at a Starbucks for my Dirty Chai on the way (you  have to have your priorities you know).

The next flight was much larger on a plane that could carry 144 people. The flight was fairly full but I did have an empty seat between me and who I will now call PSB (Plastic Surgery Barbie).  She received this nickname from me because of the first conversation I had with her.  The very first words out of her mouth were "Wow, I thought I was short but you're even shorter than me." I just nodded my head and said "Yup." 

"So how tall are you anyway?"

"4' 9 1/2" (Yes I am short)

"Wow that really is short. I'm 5'4"

"Okay" 

"I don't know many people shorter than me. I used to be only 5'3" but I had surgery and it made me taller.  I've had lots of surgeries." She then went on to tell me about them all. Hence the PSB nickname. She even asked me where I was going. "Ummmmm.....Florida unless maybe I get adventurous and decide to parachute out over the Carolina's or something."  She did get it. *face palm*

She stopped talking so I put my earphones in and turned my music on. I was excited, first I wouldn't have to share my arm rest with anyone and second I could get some writing done that I needed to work on.   (Until I realized there was no tray table to put my laptop on because I was in an window exit row. Yes I had another blonde moment but this story isn't about me it's about PSB.)

Or so I thought!!

While we are sitting at the gate she takes off her six inch wedge shoes and puts on socks. Okay, no problem, her feet must get cold on planes.  She turns sideways in her seat and leans against the window placing her legs over the armrest and her feet in the seat between us. Next we are taxiing to the runway for take off.  She gets out a tupperware type bowl and a fork.  She proceed to eat what I think was Ramen Noodles, quickly eating it before take off.  I'm not sure why she felt the need to finish her dinner before the plane took off but oh well. 

After take off I found (with the help of the guy across the isle getting his out) the tray table that was no nicely tucked in the armrest.  I get the laptop out and powered up.  Just opened my writing program and start typing.  There are two armrests and a whole seat between us that she has her feet on. I felt more than saw her put her feet down and lean over the seat toward me.  When I turned  my head her face was about four inches from mine.  

Pulling my earphones out one ear. "Yes?"

"Whatcha doin?"

"Writing."

"Writing what?"

"A book."

"What kinda book?"

"Erotica."

WAIT FOR IT!!

"OH like 50 Shades of Grey?!?!"

"No." (I swore one more person asked me this question I was going to slap them but I controlled myself)

"Oh........So can I read it?"

"Yes as soon as it's edited and published."

"Well can't I just read it while you're writing?"

"No that's not how it works. I'm about 3/4 of the way through the book. It wouldn't make sense. I would be happy to email you a copy of it when it's published if you really want to read it." (Anything to get her to be quiet so I could work)

"Oh that would be great."

She sits back in her seat and I replace my earphones and begin writing again. I get about two sentences written when I feel her close again.  

"Yes?"

"Why can't I see the screen?"

"Because it has a privacy filter on it."

"Why?"

"So no one but me can read it."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want everyone to be able to read what I'm writing until after the books are finished and released."

"Oh okay. So do you have other books?"

"Yes they can be found on SirenBookstrand, Amazon and Barnes and Noble."

"Cool I will have to look for them. (she did not ask me my name or the name of the books) Are they any good?" 

She seriously asked me if my own books were any good. Who asks someone that? How am I supposed to reply? Am I supposed to say "No they suck." or "Yes they are amazing."?  I told her I thought they were pretty good and I believe most people that I have talked to think the same way. 

"Do you have a copy with you I could read?"

"No they are ebooks and I don't have my print copy of the first one yet." Now had I been a smart person and been thinking at the time I would have gotten my kindle out and let her read them from there just to get some peace and quiet to get something done. But NO I didn't think of that until afterward.  So she continues to interrupt me and try to read what I'm writing. I finally gave up on getting anything done and packed the laptop away. 

Thinking it would be easier to pretend to be asleep than to be rude to her and ask her to stop talking I put my earphone back in and leaned my head back.  I was apparntly really tired and felt myself drifting off to sleep.  The next thing I know I'm being poked (and I don't mean a gentle tap) in the shoulder. Out of reflex both my hands came up and I was prepared to defend myself against the unknown poker. 

"Hey are you awake?" 

She didn't even realize how close she was to getting hit. Never EVER touch a sleeping person. Some people swing first, ask questions later. I am one of those people, especially in a strange setting where I can't believe I fell asleep in the first place. 

"I am now. What do you need?"

"Do you want a Pringle." First off who offers a stranger they just met on a plane a pringle and second who can eat just ONE pringle?"

"No thanks I'm good."

"Okay but if you change your mind just let me know."

"Okay."

Earphones back in, music on, drifting off again.

Poke, Poke.

"What?"

"What are you listening to?"

"Music."

"Oh okay."

Music back on. 

Poke, poke, POKE!!

"What?"

"Did you see that?" She points to the TV that's playing some sitcom I've never seen.
"No. I was trying to sleep."

"Oh well, so and so did this and said this. Isn't that funny?"

"Hilarious."

Music back on. I feel her move closer to me.  I grind my teeth together. 

"Do not touch me. PLEASE." The please was added because you must always be polite in public even if you want to strangle the person.

She is quite the rest of the flight. Which was about fifteen minutes by that time.  The plane lands I get up to retrieve my bag from the overheard storage.  She already has hers and can't wait for me to move so she squeezed by me to get off the plane first.  Mind you we are in the twentieth row so we're not going anywhere  for a while anyway but she NEEDED to get off the plane first (I guess). I'm not sure I stopped trying to figure her out about the time her first word came out of her mouth. She continues up the ramp stopped every ten feet of so right in the middle so no one can get past her to adjust her bag, then her six inch wedge shoes, then the shoulder of her shirt that slipped off her shoulder (it was an off the shoulder shirt!).  We finally get to the train to take us to the terminal, I went to the farthest train away from where she was waiting and she still somehow ended up standing next to me holding onto the same hand rail even though there were only five other people in the car. I finally get outside after baggage claim and pray my ride is waiting for me.  Thankfully even though mine was not there hers was.  She made sure to wave say goodbye to me and point me out to whoever was in the car who also waved. 

Luckily I will be flying out of a different airport than I flew into so even if she is headed north at the same time I will not run into her again.  If somehow I do, I think I WILL get adventurous and parachute out somewhere in the Carolina's.